


Obligatory Consent

by dragonydreams



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-30
Updated: 2012-12-30
Packaged: 2017-11-23 01:21:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/616497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonydreams/pseuds/dragonydreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Willow must face her past when Angelus resurfaces.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Obligatory Consent

Title: Obligatory Consent  
Author: Elisabeth  
Rating: NC-17 (overall)  
Pairings: Willow/Spike, Willow/Angelus  
Summary: Willow must face her past when Angelus resurfaces.  
Spoilers/Timeline: Present: BtVS S4/AtS S1-"Eternity"; Past: BtVS S2  
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership over these characters. I am merely borrowing them from Joss et al.  
Distribution: My site, the usual lists, anyone with previous permission. Anyone else - please ask.  
Feedback: Yes please. It makes me happy and keeps me writing.  
Author's Note: Thank you Leslie and Kat for holding my hand throughout this story. I was very nervous about both the format and pairings and wouldn't have posted this without your support and encouragement.  
Dedication: For Gabrielle, Lisa and Kat (yes, you get double billing) for encouraging/pestering me to try writing an Angelus story. 

  

_And whispering, "I will ne'er consent,"—consented._  
\-- Lord Byron,  Don Juan. Canto i. Stanza 117. 

  
"No, I understand, I'll leave as soon as possible. I'll see you soon." Willow hung up the phone. Her hands were shaking so badly that she was surprised the phone made it back onto its base. 

Numbly she sat on her bed, staring off into space. She was completely unaware of the shudders occasionally coursing through her body as she tried to make sense of what Cordelia had told her. Her most dreaded fear had come true… Angelus was back. 

Angelus… the silver-tongued corruptor of her innocence. Willow had almost completely repressed that time in her life when she had been the eventually willing toy of that monster. By the time she had re-ensouled him, Willow had loved Angelus as much as she hated him. 

Spike entered the bedroom he shared with Willow. He'd been in the kitchen heating up a mug of blood when his sire's cheerleader had called. He'd purposely kept his distance until he heard Willow end the conversation before returning to the room. 

His smug remark died on his lips as he took in his witch's stunned appearance. Before you could blink he was kneeling in front of her, trying to pull her out of her trance-like state. 

"Willow? C'mon luv, come back to me. What did that bint say to you to get you in such a state?" Nothing. No reaction. It was as if she didn't even know he was in the room with her. He desperately ran his hands along her arms, resisting the urge to shake her. "Red, you're scaring me. Please, answer me. What's wrong?" 

Spike had never seen Willow lose herself like this before. They'd been living together for the past six months, ever since the Watcher had let him out of the bathtub. Willow had taken pity on him and invited him to stay with her at her parents' house. It didn't take long for the two to become lovers. Which led to them finding their own apartment between the campus and Giles' apartment. 

Spike thought he knew all of his witch's quirks – her likes, her dislikes, what turned her on, what caused her to melt, what her phobias were, and what terrified her. Apparently he was wrong, because he had no idea what the cheerleader could have said to put Willow into such a stupor. 

Spike finally noticed that Willow was shaking and immediately moved to sit on the bed next to her. He wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and pulled her into his arms. He ran a gentle hand through her hair, hoping that the soothing action would get through to her. 

Finally Willow began to speak; only it wasn't an explanation. She simply repeated one word over and over – in desperation, in denial. "No, no, no, no, no…" 

Spike reached around Willow, who was now crying softly as well, to pick up the phone. He dialed *69 figuring that the cheerleader would be able to tell him what she had said to upset his Willow so. Then he could yell at her for upsetting Red. 

"Angel Investigations, we help the hopeless," Cordelia's usually cheery voice answered, although the strain to sound cheerful was obvious to Spike. 

"What did you say to Willow?" he demanded. 

"Spike?" Cordelia questioned. "Why don't you just ask her?" 

"I did. Only she can't answer 'cause she's gone off into a trance or something. Now, WHAT DID YOU SAY TO UPSET HER?" he growled. 

"Oh, God," Cordelia gasped. "I didn't think she'd take the news so hard. I mean she agreed to come to LA before she hung up…" 

"Why does she need to go to Hell A?" Spike asked, growing more impatient by the second. 

"I-it's Angel… he's Angelus," Cordelia finally whispered. 

"WHAT? How the bloody hell did that wanker get free?" Spike railed. 

"It was an accident," Cordelia tried to explain, not really understanding the situation herself. "You see, there was this actress…" 

"Christ," Spike muttered. "Bleeding actress probably found out he was a vamp and wanted him to turn her." 

"Yeah, that about covers it," Cordelia confirmed. "She did something and the next thing we knew… Angelus." 

"And you want Red to come and resoul the bastard," Spike guessed. 

"Uh-huh. Like yesterday." Cordelia agreed. 

"Well, she's not going anywhere just yet. Do what you have to to contain him and we'll be there as soon as we can." Spike hung up the phone, not waiting for Cordelia to respond. 

He refocused on the girl in his arms, who resembled a frightened child more than the strong woman he had come to love. 

Willow's shuddering had subsided by now and she had resumed her blank, silent staring. 

Spike pulled back a little so that he could look into her vacant eyes. He tried once more to get through to her, "Willow, luv, I called the cheerleader. She told me what happened, what she wants you to do." No response. 

"What did my sire do to you?" he wondered aloud. She shuddered again at the word "sire" and knowing how much it was going to hurt her, Spike knew what he had to do. 

Eyes closed and jaw clenched, Spike said, "It's Angelus. Angelus is back." 

It worked. Willow began to thrash against him, her small fists pounded his chest as she shook her head in denial. 

Spike grasped her shoulders holding her still. He lowered his head to look into her eyes. "Willow, look at me. It's Spike. Please, Willow, tell me why you're so scared." 

Willow blinked, finally registering that it was Spike sitting in front of her, not his dark-haired sire. She threw her arms around him, holding him in an embrace so tight Spike was thankful that he didn't need to breathe. 

"Don't let him near me. I didn't want it to happen," she wailed into Spike's shoulder. "Please, don't leave me." 

Spike's eyes flashed yellow as he tightened his arms around Willow. He wondered again what his bastard of a sire had done to Willow to terrify her so. Spike wanted to hurry up and get to LA so that he could stake his unsouled ass. 

Calming himself, he comfortingly told Willow, "No one's gonna hurt you. You're safe. He's not here. He's in LA. You're safe. I'm here. Spike's gonna protect you. I love you Willow, never gonna leave ya." 

Willow continued to sob on Spike's shoulder as he rocked them. Eventually Willow cried herself to sleep and Spike laid her down on the bed. He lay next to her, pulling her to rest against his chest. He wished that he could do more to comfort her and desperately wanted to know what had happened between Willow and Angelus in the past. 

  
~> Flashback 

Willow was brushing her hair, hoping that the repetitive action would soothe her jangled nerves. Occasionally her free hand would gently rub her throat, which was sporting a hand-shaped bruise. 

She could barely wrap her mind around the situation. Angel had lost his soul. Angelus, the head of the Scourge of Europe, one of the most feared vampires ever to walk the earth, was free again. He had basically held her hostage and threatened to kill her and her friends. 

And he had called her cute. Willow's face reddened in a mixture of shame and arousal. Of course, he had meant it as an insult. He thought her helplessness was cute. 

Then again, when she had yelped, supposedly because he had tightened his grip on her throat, it was actually because Angelus had just ground his erection into her back. Willow had never been that close to an aroused male before and it had shocked her. 

Of course, Willow remembered, Buffy had just entered the hallway. Later, in the library, Willow had figured out that Angel had lost his soul by sleeping with Buffy. Maybe he had been aroused for her and he was only trying to shock Willow by rubbing up against her. 

Willow was pulled from her memories of the day by a tapping at the French doors leading out onto her balcony. She put the brush back on her dresser and moved to pull back the curtain over one of the doors. 

Willow's yelp this time was in surprise. Angelus was standing just outside her bedroom, smirking at her. Willow panicked. She dashed back to her dresser and grabbed the hairbrush, which had a wooden handle, to use as a weapon. 

She carefully crept back to the balcony where Angelus was still smirking. Willow pulled back the curtain but didn't open the door. 

"What do you want?" she called out, knowing he'd have no trouble hearing her. 

Angelus laughed. "Open the door Willow so that we can have a conversation like civilized people." 

"You're not civilized you, you demon," Willow retorted. She barely resisted the urge to slap her forehead at the stupidity of her comeback. 

"You're right, I'm not," Angelus agreed. His fist smashed through the pane of glass next to the door handle and he let himself in. "You know, I am so glad that you trusted soulboy enough to invite him into your bedroom," he leered. 

As Angelus entered the room Willow nervously backed away from the door, the hairbrush forgotten at her side. Eventually she ran into her bed and sat down abruptly. Angelus merely laughed and stalked closer. 

"Wh-what are you doing here?" Willow asked again. "Are you going to kill me now?" 

"Were you always this amusing?" Angelus asked, purposefully evading her question. 

The scent of her fear was absolutely intoxicating. It had completely aroused him at the school earlier that evening. He had always found fear exhilarating, but Willow's was more stimulating than he could remember. Maybe it was because it had been so long since he'd held a weak and helpless girl in his arms. Or maybe it was this girl. 

That was why he'd come to her home. He'd waited out on her balcony and watched as she changed out of her baggy clothes and into her nightgown, the sheerness of her curtains hiding nothing. He'd been surprised by the beautiful lithe body she kept so well hidden. Then she'd begun brushing out that beautiful fiery hair. Hair that smelled of vanilla and cherry blossoms he recalled. It was when he'd begun to wax poetic in his thoughts that he'd made his presence known. 

Willow scooted along the edge of her bed, trying to get away from the approaching vampire. Unfortunately he moved too fast for her and trapped her legs between his knees and leaned over her, forcing Willow to lie on her back. 

He watched as Willow's chest rapidly rose and fell with her shallow breaths. Listened to the music of her racing heart. Inhaled the perfume of her fear… and was that a hint of arousal? 

Angelus placed his hands on either side of Willow's head. He leaned in close, eyebrow raised, leer in place he asked, "Why do you think I'm here?" 

"I don't know," Willow whispered, unnerved to have him so close. 

"Come on, take a guess. I know you're a smart one," Angelus goaded. 

"Well, you said you aren't going to kill me… yet." Angelus nodded. "Are you going to rape me?" 

Willow flinched as Angelus brushed a lock of hair off her face. He gripped her chin, forcing her to look up at him. "Don't shy away from me." He softened his voice, the increase of fear radiating off of her calming him. "I have no intention of raping you, sweet Willow. When the time comes, I won't need to." 

Before Willow had a chance to digest what Angelus had said his mouth had descended on hers, taking her in a bruising kiss. She didn't know what to do. She'd never really kissed a boy before. 

Pulling back from the unreceptive mouth Angelus growled, "Kiss me." 

Tears formed in Willow's eyes. Her embarrassment at not knowing what to do was coupled with not wanting to upset the dangerous vampire trapping her to her bed. "I don't know how," she finally admitted in a hoarse whisper. 

Angelus laughed. "Oh this is rich. My sweet little virgin truly is a virgin." He ran a hand from her throat down between her breasts. 

Willow glared at Angelus but held her tongue. Her body was taught with anger. She did not appreciate being laughed at. It wasn't her fault boys were never interested in her. Which is exactly what she told him. "Look, it isn't my fault boys aren't interested in me." 

"Ah, but I'm not a boy." Angelus leaned back over her body, lowering his face back to hers. "And I'm very interested," he sneered. 

When he kissed her again Willow tentatively responded. She began to slowly move her lips against his, applying a slight amount of pressure. Angelus forced his tongue into her mouth when Willow moaned in pleasure. Once again, Willow followed his lead, quickly figuring out how to reciprocate his tongue's caresses. 

Willow raised her head off the bed to try to increase the pressure, but Angelus' hand was on her hair. She whimpered and jerked her head back. 

"Why'd you stop?" he demanded, having been thoroughly enjoying her innocent, curious exploration. 

"Your hand's on my hair," Willow panted, taking the opportunity of a free mouth to take deep draughts of air. 

Angelus looked and saw that indeed, his hand was trapping her hair beneath it. Deciding that things had gone far enough for one night he suddenly pushed himself off her, turning his back. 

Willow looked confused. Had she done something wrong? She sucked at kissing, that must be it. It was no wonder no one had tried to kiss her before. She must have "bad kisser" in invisible ink written across her forehead that only boys could read. 

"Was I that bad," she asked in a small voice. 

Angelus grinned a devilish grin, marveling at her need for reassurance, even from a demon like him. "You were fine," he told her in an impassive voice. "A novice, for sure, but I already knew that. You'll get better." 

He started to move towards the balcony doors. 

"Are you leaving?" Willow asked, not sure if she wanted him to. She'd really enjoyed kissing him, as wrong as she knew it was. 

"Don't want to get ahead of ourselves, now do we?" he countered, still not facing her. "I'll be around." Angelus stepped on the broken glass as he walked out the door, closing it behind him. 

Willow was left lying on her bed staring up at the ceiling wondering what had just happened. Angelus frightened her. And he was most likely just using her to get to Buffy. But for some strange reason, she wanted him to want her. 

Willow crawled into bed, confusing thoughts circling through her head. Maybe now she would be able to understand how Xander could make out with Cordelia without really liking her. After all, Willow didn't like Angelus and she'd enjoyed kissing him. 

All that she knew for certain was that her life was never going to be the same. 

~> End Flashback 

  
Spike watched Willow as she restlessly slept, obviously plagued with dreams. 

He tried to remember his time in Sunnydale during the time that Angelus was free. At first he'd thought it would be great – his family was reunited. Granted he was stuck in that blasted wheelchair, but with his sire's blood he'd be able to heal that much quicker. 

All too soon he realized that his sire was not as he should have been, the soul having poisoned him in some way. Angelus took as much pleasure in tormenting Spike as he ever had, that hadn't changed. He had taken his precious Dru away from him, again. She barely spent any time with poor, chair-bound Spike once she had her 'Daddy' back. 

On top of that, Angelus had refused Spike his blood. He'd laughed at Spike's predicament, saying it was his own fault. Besides, Spike had tried to kill him in order to restore Drusilla. He had found withholding his healing blood to be the perfect punishment for attempted sire-cide. Which meant that it had taken Spike twice as long to heal as it should have. 

Spike had been so wrapped up in his own grudges against his sire at the time that he hadn't paid much attention to his activities outside of the mansion. He knew that somehow Angelus was preparing to destroy the whiny slayer. He just didn't know the particulars of how he was going about it, aside from the whole Acathala thing. 

Willow began to stir in Spike's arms, slowly coming to wakefulness. He soothingly rubbed her back as her eyes fluttered open. She offered him a weak smile. 

Spike grinned in relief at the consciousness in her eyes. "Welcome back," he whispered, brushing the hair off her face. 

"What happened?" Willow asked, not sure how she ended up lying in bed in Spike's arms. 

Spike's features hardened briefly, not wanting to send her into a relapse. He knew that if he wanted answers he'd have to tell her the truth. "You went into shock after talking to the cheerleader." 

Willow's face scrunched up in thought. She remembered talking to Cordelia. She wanted Willow to come to LA because - Willow's eyes widened in remembrance - Angelus was free. 

"Angelus," she whispered, burrowing into Spike's embrace. 

Spike ran his fingers through her hair, dreading this conversation, but knowing it had to be had. 

"He did something to you last time he was out, didn't he?" he softly asked. There was no accusation in his tone, only concern. 

Willow nodded her head against his chest. She had hoped that she'd never have to tell Spike about her relationship with Angelus. She knew how much Spike hated his sire and didn't want him to hate her for what she'd done with him. 

"What is it luv?" Spike asked, scooting down the bed so that they were at eye level. "You can tell me anything." 

Willow shook her head. "No," she whispered, "You'll hate me and leave me." 

"I'm not gonna leave," he insisted, wondering what she could be so afraid of telling him. "Nothing you could say or do would ever make me hate you. Tell me what he did to you." 

Forest green tear-filled eyes locked on cerulean blue ones. "He made me love him." 

Now that wasn't an answer Spike expected to hear. He had imagined nights of torture and rape. Secret presents meant to frighten her. Nightly stalkings to make her paranoid. But love? 

The muscle in his jaw visibly ticked as he ground his teeth. He took a deep, calming, unneeded breath before saying, "Come again?" 

"I hated him and I'd never hated anyone before." Willow said, her voice growing stronger. "And with every act he committed to make me hate him, he did something equally devious to make me love him as well." 

'Now that sounds like the Angelus I knew and loathed,' Spike thought. He pushed his anger down, knowing it wouldn't do Willow any good at that time. 

"Aw, pet," Spike lamented, pulling Willow close and dropping a gentle kiss on her lips. 

Willow immediately deepened the kiss, needing the physical reassurance that Spike wasn't going to leave her. Her hands moved into his hair and over his back as she ran her tongue along his lips, begging for entry. 

Instead of opening for her, Spike gently pulled his head away. "I don't think we're done talking, pet," he told her. 

Willow's face crumpled, "I knew it, you don't want me anymore now that you know." 

She started to pull away, but Spike held her fast. "Now you know that isn't what I meant. There's more to your story that I need to know." 

"Later." Willow kissed him again. "Need you now." 

Spike groaned and pulled Willow back to his mouth. This time he opened without needing to be asked, giving Willow whatever she needed. There would be time enough later to relive painful memories. Now he was going to reassure his girl just how much he loved her. 

Willow pressed Spike onto his back, moving to straddle his waist. She clawed at his black t-shirt, needing to feel his smooth, hard chest against her. Spike sat up enough to wrench the material over his head before reclaiming Willow's mouth. 

Willow's hands roamed over the perfectly sculpted chest beneath her. Her thumbs circled his nipples until they were hard little nubs. She pulled herself away from Spike's mouth to kiss her way down his neck to explore his torso with her lips. Spike arched under her fevered exploration, her lips branding him with their heat. 

His hands pulled Willow's shirt out of her jeans and snaked under the material. They flitted over her belly up to her bra-clad breasts. Needing the feel of her flesh against him as desperately as she appeared to need him, Spike sat up and pulled Willow's shirt over her head, quickly removing her bra as well. 

His mouth immediately latched onto her left breast. Always her left breast. Willow had insisted that her right one wasn't as sensitive and rather than argue the point, Spike had done as she wished. 

As Spike suckled her breast Willow scooted back enough to rub his growing erection through his pants. After a few strokes she quickly unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, freeing him into her desperate hands. She continued to run her hands along his shaft, loving the knowledge that he was aroused for her. 

Willow released him and pulled away from his mouth. Spike reached for her as she stood, but lay back again and raised his hips when he realized that she was trying to finish undressing him. Willow yanked his jeans off and shimmied out of her own jeans and panties before re-straddling her vampire. 

Without any further preparation, Willow slammed down onto Spike. They both groaned at the sudden sensation of filling and being filled. Spike was always amazed at how tight and hot she was surrounding him. He didn't have long to marvel at the sensations as Willow began to set a frantic pace. 

Willow's hands pressed into Spike's chest, her nails occasionally digging into his flesh. Spike's hands molded themselves to her hips, aiding in her desperate movements. Willow leaned down to capture Spike's mouth in a searing kiss. Her need for release was growing, just out of reach. 

One of Spike's hands drifted up her side to caress a breast. He was so caught up in their coupling that he didn't realize he'd begun fondling the forbidden right breast. 

Willow broke the kiss, pushing his arm away with a frantic, "No." Spike looked into her wild eyes, seeing the fear behind them. Understanding finally lit behind his eyes and he nodded his head. 

Grasping her hips, Spike rolled them, pinning Willow beneath his body. He kissed her again, pouring all of his love, longing and understanding into the kiss. His tongue thrust into her mouth mimicking the actions of his hips as he drove himself into her. 

Spike slid one hand over her hip so that he could reach her clit. He moved his thumb in short circles over the hardened nub, drawing her ever closer to release. Willow pulled Spike's head down to her neck, silently encouraging him to bite her. Spike paused in his movements – Willow had never let him bite her during sex before. He pulled his head back to look at her questioningly. 

"Please," she whispered, needing to erase the memory of Angelus' fangs from her mind. Holding her eyes, Spike morphed. When she didn't shy away from him he slowly lowered his head back to her neck, praying to every deity known to man that he would be able to do this. 

Spike's hips began to move again as he kissed and licked at the flesh over the vein, wanting to relax her even further. He sucked the flesh into his mouth, making it nice and tender. When he felt Willow's walls fluttering around him in preparation for her release he eased his fangs into her flesh. Amazingly there was no pain – only the ambrosia that was Willow's blood. 

Willow cried out her pleasure, her body arching off the bed as Spike gave her what she so desperately needed. Willow's orgasm triggered Spike's and he shot his cool seed deep inside her. 

Spike reluctantly retracted his fangs, lapping at the puncture marks until they closed. He moved to lie next to Willow and pulled her against him. 

"So I take it those two freckles on your right breast about a bite width apart are the reason I'm not allowed near it," Spike opened. 

Too filled with shame to speak, Willow nodded her head against his chest. 

"Red, why'd you let me bite you today?" he softly asked. 

Willow shrugged a shoulder. 

"Now that's not true," Spike quietly insisted. "You've never let me so much as show my wrinklies when we've made love before. Why's today different?" 

"You know why," Willow whispered. 

"Did you think you had something to prove?" Willow shook her head. "Then why? Tell me, baby. I'm just trying to understand." 

"Needed you," she whimpered. Willow raised herself onto an elbow to look down at Spike's worried face. She ran her free hand over the features she had come to love so deeply. "Needed you to erase the memory of him," she admitted. "Now you hate me, don't you?" 

Spike pulled her down for a soft, reassuring kiss. "How many times do I have to tell you I could never hate you? So you used me to banish memories of my sire. Didn't hear me complainin' did ya? Feel free to use me any time you like," he leered. 

This brought a small smile to Willow's face. "I'm sorry, I'm just all messed up inside." She tapped the side of her head. "I never wanted you to know." 

"I'm glad you told me," Spike insisted. "I always thought the reason you smelled like my sire was because you gave him his soul back. Now I know the truth." 

Willow's eyes grew large in surprise and panic. "You could smell him on me? But I thought he didn't claim me. He told me he didn't." 

"He didn't," Spike quickly reassured her. "I would have known the second I came near you if he had claimed you. Even without being a claiming bite a vampire's saliva gets into your system. If you're bitten often enough," Spike averted his eyes, "the vamp's scent is left on you." 

"Oh," Willow quietly said. Angelus certainly had bitten her a number of times when they were 'together'. She had been so surprised the first time it'd happened. 

  
~> Flashback 

Several weeks passed during which Angelus would invite himself into Willow's room nearly every night. Giles had been looking for an uninvite spell, but they hadn't found one yet. Willow hadn't told anyone of Angelus' nightly visits, afraid of what they'd think about her. 

As much as she hated to admit it to herself, and even more to Angelus when he demanded it, Willow began to enjoy his visits. Even as he teased her body with his hands and mouth, he would remind her that she was supposed to be the 'good girl,' that her friends would never understand and be repulsed by her actions. 

Such a night was tonight. Willow had learned to leave her French doors unlocked after that first night. A piece of cardboard covered the broken pane of glass in the door Angelus had broken, a constant reminder that nothing would stand between him and what he wanted. 

Willow was seated at her desk doing her homework when she heard Angelus open a balcony door. She paused in her work, but didn't turn to face him. 

Angelus smirked at her deliberate attempt to ignore him. She always resisted a bit at first before succumbing to the pleasure he could offer. He was finding this shy young woman to be quite amusing and wondered what the soul had ever seen in the blonde slayer when this fiery mortal was free for the taking. 

His hand closed over Willow's shoulder, but she didn't jump in shock. "Tsk, tsk, tsk," Angelus scolded. "You should know by now that I'm not to be ignored." 

"I wasn't ignoring you," Willow bravely said. "I-I was just trying to finish this computer program." 

Angelus looked over her shoulder to see that she was indeed in the middle of writing out computer instructions. 

"Finish it in the morning," he insisted, lifting her chair and turning her away from the desk. 

Willow sighed, placing her pencil back on the desk as she was forcibly turned to face the vampire beside her. 

"Why do you keep coming back?" Willow softly questioned. "You could have anyone you want, why do you keep coming back to me?" 

"I think you know the answer to that," Angelus smirked. 

"It's because I'm Buffy's friend," Willow guessed. "You're just doing this to throw in her face." 

"That's part of it," Angelus admitted, having no desire to placate the girl. "But mostly it's because it's just so much fun. The corruption of an innocent has always been one of my favorite pastimes. And you are so deliciously innocent." Angelus lifted one of Willow's pigtails to make his point, sliding his hand down the length of it. 

"Isn't there some other innocent you could be corrupting," Willow belligerently asked, not appreciating being used. 

"Probably," he shrugged. "But like you said, breaking you will break the slayer. Her only other little friend is that moron, and I'm not in the mood for a boy right now." 

Willow shivered at the implication that he could still go after Xander in the same manner. Regardless of the fact that he and Cordelia were officially a couple now, Willow still loved him. 

Angelus noticed her reaction to his mention of the boy. He knew of Willow's attraction to the oblivious idiot, but didn't realize how strong it was. Angelus continued to caress Willow as he followed through with this new bit of information. 

He lifted her sweater over her head, leaving her in her bra, for now. Willow sat with her hands in her lap, patiently waiting to see what he was going to do to her tonight. 

"What do you think he would say if he saw you now," Angelus taunted. His hand ran over her shoulders and down her chest, over her bra. His other hand removed the hair bands from Willow's hair, freeing her from her girlish hairstyle. 

Willow refused to let him get to her. She sat perfectly still and stared straight ahead, into her fish tank. She watched her fishies swim around their tank, trying to block out Angelus' voice. 

"Would he look on you with the same respect he has for you now, the all knowing, best friend?" Her refusal to respond to him was beginning to infuriate him. "I don't think that he would. I bet he'd turn his back on you for allowing yourself to be touched like this by me. I know that he never liked Angel, so what would he do if he found out that I was in your bedroom every night, touching you, kissing you…" 

"He'd know that you were doing what you wanted to do, not because I wanted you to," Willow retorted, finally feeling the need to defend her childhood friend. 

"Ah, but you do want this. Your body betrays you." Angelus removed her bra and pinched her hardened nipple to demonstrate his point. Willow gasped at the sudden pain, even as the scent of her arousal grew. 

He bent down to scoop Willow off the chair, pressing his lips to hers in a demanding kiss. Just as he knew she would, Willow clung to him, responding to his kiss. He set her down on the bed and proceeded to pull off her colorful tights and panties, followed by her skirt. 

Willow turned her head away, looking at her fish tank again as Angelus lay to the right of her on the bed, still fully dressed, making her nakedness even more noticeable. She did her best not to try to cover herself. 

Angelus noticed her looking at those damn fish again and was really starting to hate them. He needed to get Willow's attention back on him, where it belonged. His hands began to roam over her body. He leaned across her body to take her left breast into his mouth, suckling and licking at her nipple as his hand alternately twisted and pinched her right one. The conflicting sensations were slowly driving Willow insane. 

Angelus switched tactics, action alone not drawing Willow's gaze from the tank. He released her breasts, drawing a satisfactory whimper from the girl beneath him. He raised his head back up to Willow's and in a voice that brooked no argument told her, "Look at me." 

Willow finally turned her head to glare up at Angelus. He loved the passion in her eyes; granted it was anger, but it was passion nonetheless. 

His mouth descended on hers and Willow was helpless to do anything but reciprocate. She hesitantly raised her arms to wrap her fingers in his hair. She hated this part, when she gave in to his touch, to his kiss. 

Angelus' hand skimmed down her body, approaching the new territory of her curls. He felt Willow clench her thighs together, trying to stave off the inevitable. Pulling out of the kiss he made his way over to her ear. 

"Open your legs," he forcefully whispered. Willow shook her head. 

"Do it or I go after your boy," he threatened. 

Willow whimpered but did as he asked. She unclenched her thighs and slowly parted them. She gasped as Angelus suddenly plunged a finger inside her virgin channel. She looked up at him with pain-tinged eyes, silently begging him to make the pain go away. 

"Relax," he gruffly told her. 

He leaned down to kiss her again; soft, teasing kisses that he knew she enjoyed. Willow eagerly responded to the kiss, trying to distract herself from what his hand was doing to her. As her body began to relax and open, Angelus added a second finger to his ministrations. Willow whimpered into the kiss – music to Angelus' ears – but didn't try to break the kiss. If anything she kissed him even harder. 

Angelus turned to capture Willow's right breast with his mouth. He laved her puckered nipple with his tongue, occasionally worrying it with his teeth, only to bite down on it. Willow arched into every bite, panting heavily. Angelus' thumb had begun to massage her clit in time with the fingers moving inside her. He could feel the delicious tension in her body, poised on the edge of release. 

Willow's body was on fire. The occasional pain from Angelus' mouth on her breast, coupled with what his hand was doing inside her – such new and strange and wonderful sensations. Her body felt like it was going to come apart if something didn't happen soon. She didn't know what it would take to end this delicious torture, but she had a feeling that Angelus would. 

She didn't even realize when she began speaking, let alone that she was begging. "Please, Angelus, I need… I need…" 

"What do you need Little One," he asked, delighted with the pleading tone in her voice. 

"I don't know. I just need…" 

Angelus slipped into gameface and effortlessly pierced her breast with his fangs. 

Willow cried out as the sensations seemed to culminate with that one act. The bite itself didn't hurt, she barely even noticed as he greedily pulled her blood into his mouth. The fire that had been building inside her all evening – that ball of tension that had been growing in her belly – it felt like the floodgates had been ripped away and she was drowning in pleasurable sensation. 

Angelus was still lapping at the leaking wounds in her breast when she came down from her high. Sensing that she was coming back to herself, he began to speak. 

"You see the way you react to me… The way your body hungers for the release only I can bring you. No one else will ever be able to make you feel like this. No one will want you after this. Your boy would look at you with disgust if he knew the kind of pleasure I bring to you. He'll never want you knowing how you respond to my touch, to my bite." 

Willow looked down at her breast in horror, finally realizing that he had bitten her. She began to struggle, trying to get away from him. 

"No, you're wrong. Xander's my best friend, he loves me." 

"You just keep telling yourself that," Angelus sneered. "But we both know the truth." He gave his mark one last lick, reveling in the shudder that coursed through her body at the simple touch. 

Angelus paused at the balcony doors to admire Willow lying flushed and panting on the bed, one hand covering her right breast as she stared at her fish. He decided that those fish were really too distracting for his spitfire. 

The next night, while talking to Buffy, Willow found her fish strung together in an envelope. 

~> End Flashback 

  
Try as he might, Spike was having a difficult time keeping his worries and doubts at bay. There were so many questions screaming at him that they were giving him a headache. 

'I can't believe I fell for another girl Angelus got to first. What if she's only with me 'cause he's my sire? Am I just a surrogate for the vampire she truly wants? Does she resent me for being the childe of Angelus? Is that why she took me in in the first place?' 

Suddenly lying naked next to Willow in bed wasn't such a comfortable place to be. Spike stood, pulled on his jeans and began to pace. He unconsciously began to growl softly as similar thoughts flitted through his head. 

Willow watched Spike's pacing silently from the bed, her nervousness and fear growing with each circuit of the room. As discretely as possible she slid from the bed and inched her way to retrieve her robe and slide it on. She sat back on the bed, leaning against the headboard. 

Unable to take the tension in the room any longer, she stated, "You're upset that I didn't tell you before." 

"Of course I'm upset," Spike practically shouted. He saw Willow cringe back in fear at his outburst and quickly tamped down his emotions. The next time he spoke it was with a gentler voice. "I'm just trying to figure out why you kept it a secret for so long." 

"Maybe because I thought you'd take the news badly," Willow replied, her voice dripping with sarcasm. 

Spike grinned sheepishly and sat on the bed next to the woman he loved more than unlife itself. "I'm sorry. It's just…" Spike ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "Every girl I've loved he's gotten to first." 

"That's one reason I didn't want to tell you. I know you and Angelus don't get along and I didn't want you to think less of me for having once loved him." Willow softly explained, reaching for one of Spike's hands. 

Spike looked at her bewildered. "Think less…?" 

"I know I'm… damaged goods," Willow continued. "Stupid Willow let herself get seduced by the big scary vampire." She sniffled. "Willow let a smooth-talking, soulless, demon take her virginity." 

Spike stared at her open-mouthed. It had never occurred to him that she was ashamed of her time with Angelus. His demon was screaming at him to take offense to the way she was describing his sire because it was nothing short of what he has done himself. It was something Angelus had taught him well – how to seduce naïve young women into their beds. It was a game for them; they'd arrive in a new city and see how many virgins they could seduce and drain the fastest without Drusilla and Darla finding out. 

An unaccustomed feeling of guilt assailed the blonde vampire as he listened to Willow's self-loathing for succumbing to a master seducer. 

Spike moved up the bed until he was able to take Willow into his arms. "It's not your fault, luv. Angelus is a master at that game." Spike cringed at the wording. 

"Game," Willow cried in anger, pulling out of his embrace. "You think it was a game?" 

"I know it was," Spike admitted. "Only you're one of the few to survive to tell the tale." 

"You knew he'd done this to me?" Willow accused her lover. 

"No! No, I had no idea," Spike insisted. "I just know how the game works. He taught it to me well," Spike uncomfortably admitted. 

"You've done to other girls what he did to me?" Willow could feel her heart breaking at the idea. "You tormented innocent girls into fulfilling your desires, making them love you while at the same time convincing them that they were alone or threatening their friends?" 

"Need I remind you I'm an 'evil, soulless, demon'?" Spike snapped. "I may have this soddin' chip in my head, but that doesn't mean I grew some kind of soul like my poof of a sire." 

"And is this just one of your games?" Willow's angry tears threatened to fall as she gestured between them and the bed. 

All of the anger drained out of Spike. "Never," he earnestly said. "I'm sorry Angelus chose to play that… game," he winced as he said the word, "with you. And I'm sorry you had to go through that. But I know that it wasn't your fault. He may be a bastard, but he's a smooth one at that. He has a way of convincing you that it's in your best interest to do what he says, especially if you want to make it out alive. I know what a kind, caring, and compassionate woman you are and that you would walk through fire, or subject yourself to Angelus, if you thought that it would save your friends." 

Willow nodded sadly at what he said, fresh tears of relief falling from her eyes. Spike brushed the teardrops from her cheeks. 

"Are-are we okay?" Willow nervously asked, completely drained from all of the emotional turmoil. 

"Yeah, we're good," Spike confirmed. 

The feeling of his soft, cool lips against hers was all the reassurance Willow needed that they would survive this surfacing of Angelus. No matter what was going to happen in LA, Spike would stand by her. 

  
~> Flashback 

The night Willow had performed the univite spell Angelus had been furious... 

She hadn't even been able to do any homework she was so nervous waiting for his arrival and she wasn't disappointed. 

Angelus approached her French doors as he always did, with self-assurance and a swagger in this step. He'd opened the door without knocking and was completely stunned to meet the invisible barrier. He'd tried again, just to make sure it wasn't a fluke. 

"Willow," he'd softly called out. "Willow, why can't I get in?" 

"We did an univite spell, go away." Willow called back. 

"Now why would you do a stupid thing like that?" Angelus still spoke in that sickeningly sweet voice. 

"Bu-Buffy knew I'd invited Angel in before, so she made me do it. Especially after the fish incident." 

"Well, Buffy's not here now. Invite me in." Angelus wickedly grinned. 

"No," Willow nervously refused. 

All traces of amusement left Angelus. He growled, "What?" 

"I said, no?" Willow meekly answered. 

"Invite me in," he demanded again. "Or do you want me to go straight to Buffy and tell her what we've been doing?" 

"No, no please, don't do that," Willow pleaded. 

"Oh, I'll do just that." 

"Okay, okay, come in," Willow anxiously issued. 

"That's my girl," Angelus purred, stepping into the room. He caressed her cheek before slapping her. "Never deny me anything I ask ever again." 

Willow numbly nodded her head, her hand covering the area Angelus had hit. 

"Now what would be a fitting punishment for being such a bad girl," Angelus mused aloud. Merriment lit his eyes as he turned to Willow and ordered her, "Strip." 

Head bowed, Willow slowly began to remove her clothes. After discarding her tights, Angelus picked them up, pulling on them to test their resiliency. 

When she was completely naked, Angelus circled around her, admiring the way her pale skin glowed and the rawness of the bite mark on her breast. He prided himself on always biting her in the same place, assuring that she would forever carry a reminder of their time together. 

After completing his circle, Angelus said, "Get on the bed, hands above your head." 

Willow shivered in anticipation, the combination of fear and excitement making her unable to tell which was the stronger emotion. She did as she was ordered, lying on her back on the bed, arms raised above her head. 

Angelus tied Willow's hands together using her discarded tights. Her headboard was solid, so he had to make due with simply having her hands bound together. "Leave them there," he told her for good measure. 

Angelus took a step back from the bed, admiring the sight before him. Willow shifted as she tried to get used to her arms' position. Her eyes were warily watching him, waiting to see what he was going to do next. A bruise was forming on her cheek from where he'd hit her earlier. Her breasts were enticingly rising and falling with each breath she took. Her heart was pounding in anticipation. Her legs were slightly spread, giving him an enticing view. 

Catching Willow's eye, Angelus began to strip. He smirked at the increasing scent of Willow's arousal as his red velvet shirt, black leather pants and black silk boxers were removed. He lightly stroked his cock as he mentally debated where to start. 

He stretched out on the bed next to Willow, lazily running a hand from neck to knee. He knew that even this light, teasing motion would easily stimulate Willow's sensitive skin. He wasn't disappointed. 

Willow whimpered at the cool fingers barely touching her skin. She arched and twisted, trying to increase the pressure of his hand, only to have it removed. 

"So responsive," Angelus silkily observed. "And to think you tried to deny yourself the pleasure of my touch." 

"I'm sorry," Willow whimpered. "Don't stop." 

"Don't stop?" he echoed. "Not even to…" He left the sentence hanging as his mouth descended on hers. 

Willow moaned into the fierce kiss. She tried to lower her arms to encircle Angelus' head, but he anticipated the action and placed a hand on her bound wrists, growling softly in warning. 

Keeping his hand in place, Angelus left Willow's delightful mouth to tease her chest and breasts. His cool lips warmed on her flesh as he lightly ran them over her skin, his tongue occasionally flicking out to taste her. 

His light, teasing touches changed suddenly as he engulfed her right breast in his mouth, roughly pinching her left nipple. Willow's cry of pain delighted the vampire as he continued to worry the nipple in his mouth with his teeth. He allowed his fangs to descend, lightly scraping the areola, before sinking into his mark. 

Willow gasped at the sensation. Her Pavlovian response brought her to the edge of an orgasm, as Angelus usually only bit her as she climaxed. 

Angelus pulled away from Willow, giving her a moment to calm down. He smirked at her, undeniably pleased with her uninhibited reactions to him, but not wanting her to cum yet. This was, after all, her punishment. 

Willow groaned in frustration, so close to finding release, only to be denied. 

Angelus chucked at her frustrated response. "Just look at you, Willow. Lying naked and bound, begging for my touch. You have such an amazing body," he ran a hand over her heated flesh. "You're so incredibly responsive." His lips twisted cruelly as he commented, "Buffy wasn't nearly as responsive for Angel. She'd never allow herself to be tied up by a demon. She was so desperate when they fucked that she fumbled through the experience, never knowing the pleasure that could be found by simply lying back and allowing someone to give her pleasure. Do you think she made a mistake?" 

Angelus slid a finger inside her, distracting the redhead from answering right away. Feeling a need to defend her friend, Willow panted, "It was her first time, she didn't know any better." 

Angelus removed his hand, obviously displeased with her answer. Her whimper of protest helped ease his disapproval. 

Trying another approach, Angelus asked her conversationally, "Did you know he never bit her? There is not one scratch mark from a fang," he brushed a finger over one such mark on Willow's abdomen. "Not one set of bite marks to beautifully mar her skin." Angelus ran his thumb over the lightly oozing wounds from minutes before, raising it to Willow's lips. 

She eagerly sucked his thumb into her mouth, licking it clean of her blood. Angelus bent his head to lick the wounds closed. Willow arched into his mouth, reveling in the feel of his rough tongue on her body. 

Angelus shifted his body so that he was lying between Willow's spread legs, his nearly painful erection brushing against her curls. Willow's body stiffened as she realized what it was she was feeling rubbing against her. 

Angelus raised his face to Willow's, kissing her before she could say anything. Her mouth was open, prepared to speak, and Angelus fully took advantage, sliding his tongue inside, laying claim. Willow eagerly returned the kiss, sucking his tongue into her mouth. 

Angelus broke the kiss to look into her lust-glazed eyes. "You think you can do better than Buffy?" he taunted. Willow's eyes widened in anticipation – she'd secretly always felt second best to Buffy, and Angelus wanted her to do something better than her. He thought she could do something better than the perfect blonde. 

Willow smiled wickedly and raised her hips in invitation. Angelus' lip curled in satisfaction as he grasped his cock and began to slide inside her. When he reached her virgin barrier he pulled back slightly before fully sheathing himself inside of the girl beneath him. 

Tears formed in Willow's eyes and she cried out at the sudden pain as he took her virginity. Once the initial shock passed the welled-up tears spilled over her lashes. 

Angelus licked her tears away and began to move. He had waited for so long to be inside this girl and she was every bit as tight and hot and wet as he'd expected. He needed to move slowly at first, barely having the room to move inside her. As her body grew accustomed to his girth he began moving in earnest. 

Willow wriggled beneath Angelus as the pain gave way to the beginnings of pleasure. She would raise and lower her wrists, desperately wanting to touch him. Wanting her hands on him just as desperately, Angelus reached up and tore through the material binding Willow's wrists as his mouth attacked hers. 

Willow's fingers immediately threaded themselves in his hair, pulling his head closer, nipping at his lips with her teeth. Angelus growled in pleasure and sped up his thrusts. Willow began to experimentally lift her hips to meet his, learning that if she angled herself just right he'd rub against her clit. 

She moaned at the additional stimulation, dragging her hands from his hair, down his back, over his ass. Her nails dug lightly into his cool flesh as she reversed the path. Angelus reciprocated by morphing and grazing his fangs over Willow's shoulders and chest, bringing thin lines of blood to the surface which he eagerly lapped up. 

Willow began to feel the tell-tale signs of her impending orgasm, amazed at the differences of its approach with Angelus inside her. She started babbling, her hands grasping at him more frantically. 

"Please, Angelus, please… so close… please… more…" 

Angelus reached down, rubbing Willow's clit in short strokes as he slammed himself inside her, close to losing control as well. 

For the second time that night Angelus sunk his fangs in Willow's breast as he shot his cool seed inside her, within seconds of Willow calling out his name in ecstasy. Angelus licked the wounds closed as Willow panted beneath him. He pulled out of the exhausted girl and laid next to her until he had full control of his faculties again. 

When she had the energy, Willow rolled onto her side, facing Angelus. "So, how'd I do?" she brazenly asked. 

"Not bad," was his smug reply. 

Her face fell a little. Still, she hopefully asked, "Better than Buffy?" 

"Much," he purred, pulling her into a passionate kiss. 

When he released her, Angelus stood and began to dress. When he finished he turned to see Willow still lying on her side, skin flushed from her orgasm, lips full from being kissed, hair beautifully disheveled. He almost didn't want to leave. 

Angelus mentally shook himself out of his thoughts. Before stepping outside he turned back to Willow. "Don't even think about redoing that spell." 

Willow nodded her head, the reality of what had just happened beginning to sink in. Angelus recognized the beginnings of guilt on her face and reveled in it before taking his leave. 

Willow's whisper of "Oh God, what have I done?" reached Angelus' sensitive ears on the balcony and he smiled. 

~> End Flashback 

  
After a short nap Willow showered, dressed and had a quick snack. She was still emotionally exhausted, but she knew that the sooner she got to LA to restore Angel's soul, the better. 

Spike watched as Willow moved about her study (they had converted the spare bedroom into an office/study space/spellcasting room) gathering the ingredients she'd need. She placed her mortar & pestle, various herbs, and a couple of books in her "bag of tricks," as he liked to call it. Finally she carefully lifted a glass ball off her desk and wrapped it in a silk cloth. 

"What's that?" he asked from the doorway. 

"Orb of Thesula," she answered. With a blush she added, "I was using it as a paperweight." 

"You mean to tell me you've had a soul-restoring orb sitting around my apartment?" Spike incredulously questioned. 

"Um, yeah," Willow admitted. At Spike's horrified look, she added, "Well wouldn't you keep one around if you were the only one who could banish Angelus?" 

"Alright, I see your point," he conceded. "But did it have to be just sittin' out there?" 

"I promise that the next one will stay out of sight." 

"Next one?" 

"Until someone is able to make sure that Angel's soul is permanently bound to his body, I am never going to be without one of these babies." Willow informed her lover. 

"Well why haven't you done it?" Spike asked. 

"I didn't think you'd want me to devote the amount of time it would take to research the right spell," Willow shrugged. 

"But what about before we got together," he asked, trying to ignore the niggling thought in the back of his head that said that she secretly wanted Angelus to return for her. 

Willow sighed and sat on her comfy chair. "I just didn't have the time. I was afraid that somehow HE would find out and come after me again." 

"And now?" Spike prodded. 

"I never want to go through a night like tonight again. If it won't bother you, I think I'll start looking for that spell sooner rather than later." 

"I never want that wanker to hurt you again," Spike told Willow. "You do whatever you have ta do to make sure that happens." 

Willow's entire face lit up. "Do you really mean that? You want me to make your sire's soul permanent?" 

"If it will give you peace of mind, then I'll even help with the bloody research." 

Willow threw her arms around Spike, pulling him into a tight embrace. "Thank you," she mumbled into his neck. She pulled back far enough to pull his mouth down to hers. 

When the kiss finally ended, many long minutes later, Spike smirked, "If I'd known that's all it would take to lift your spirits I would have suggested it hours ago." 

Willow playfully slapped his arm as she stepped out of his embrace and resumed her packing. Spike slid his arms around her waist from behind as she gave the bag one more check. 

"I think that's everything," Willow said. "I suppose we should get going." 

"Not just yet," Spike objected. Willow turned in his arms to look up at him, a quizzical look on her face. "Are you absolutely certain you can face him?" 

Willow smiled at Spike's concern. As frustrating as his overprotectiveness could be at times, she secretly loved it. 

"I can do it," she assured him. 

"But do you have to go to LA? Can't you just do it from here? You weren't even in the same place as him the last time, right?" 

"No, I was in the hospital," Willow agreed. "But I don't know if it will work from this far away. At least last time we were within a couple of miles of each other. I don't want to take any chances that might keep this from working." 

"Fine," Spike unnecessarily sighed. "Let's go." 

  
~> Flashback 

The night after Ms. Calendar was killed Angelus couldn't wait to visit his redhead. He'd enjoyed watching her cry at Buffy's house when she'd heard the news. Even with her face red and blotchy from crying she was beautiful. 

Willow had been tempted to resurrect the univite spell after Ms. Calendar's death, but the thought of what Angelus would do to her, or say about her, kept her from going through with it. Her anger with herself grew ten-fold. She had given her body to the… thing/monster… that killed her favorite teacher. Granted, she had known what he was when she allowed him into her bed, but now she had the daily reminder of what he was. 

Although not completely unexpected, Willow was still surprised when Angelus showed up in her room the night after Ms. Calendar's murder. She leveled an angry glare at the demon, willing him away. 

Angelus' lips curled evilly as he asked in a voice that oozed insincerity, "What? Not happy to see me?" 

"What do you think," Willow practically screamed. "How could you do that?" 

"You don't think Giles liked his present?" Angelus innocently asked. 

The rage building inside of Willow was clearly visible – her eyes shone with repressed anger, her cheeks flushed, her breathing increased – all things Angelus found irresistible. Angelus slithered across the room to stand in front of Willow. 

As soon as he was within range she began pounding on his chest. Angry tears fell from her eyes as she wailed, "Why? Why did you kill her?" 

Angelus resisted the urge to laugh at her feeble attempts to injure him. "She was going to restore the soul. What do you think I should have done?" 

"I don't know," Willow sobbed. "Destroy the curse? Did you have to kill her?" 

"Yes," Angelus growled, not liking having his actions judged. "She was going to force me back in that… cage. I destroyed the curse – burned it up, destroyed her computer. But the only way to ensure that she couldn't tell anyone about it was by destroying her." 

"Are you going to kill me now?" Willow asked, resigned to her inevitable fate. 

Angelus laughed. "Now why would I want to kill you just yet? I'd say there's still plenty of fun to be had." 

"You think I'd let you touch me after what you did?" Willow spat, stepping away from him. 

Angelus caught her arm, twisting it sharply. "Oh I think you'll let me," he snarled. "In fact, I don't think you'll have a choice." 

He pulled her body flush against his, grounding his already prominent erection into her belly. He pressed his lips against hers in a demanding, brutal kiss. 

Willow mentally cringed as her body began to respond to his forceful behavior. Her mouth opened of its own volition, welcoming the tongue that had yet to ask for admittance. She could feel Angelus' chest rumble with suppressed mirth at the action as he pulled her even closer, the vibrations causing her nipples to pebble. 

Angelus tugged on her cardigan, pulling it down her arms. He pulled out of the kiss to yank Willow's shirt over her head, ripping her bra off as his hands descended. 

"I hate you," Willow declared with passion-filled eyes, even as her hands attacked the buttons of his shirt, finally pulling the material apart. Willow knew it was wrong to crave his touch, to want to touch him in return. After all, it had been his hands that had snapped Ms. Calendar's neck. Those same hands that could bring her so much pleasure. 

Again Angelus chuckled, reveling in her opposing actions and words. She was everything he'd hoped she'd be. He swelled with – pride – at the knowledge that she was so easily molded to his desires. 

Oblivious and uncaring of Angelus' thoughts, Willow attacked his bare torso with her lips and teeth. She kissed along the well-defined muscles of Angelus' chest. She licked his nipples until they beaded under her touch and then roughly pulled at them with her teeth. 

As Willow licked her way down his abdomen she found herself being pushed to her knees. She looked up at Angelus, defiance in her eyes. 

Seeing as she didn't seem to want to take the hint tonight, Angelus unbuttoned and unzipped his leather pants. He grasped Willow's hands with his and guided her to lower the material. "Finish undressing me," he growled. 

Willow clenched her jaw but did as he ordered. She roughly pulled his shoes off before yanking one pant leg off and then the other. When he was completely naked she glared up at him from where she sat on her haunches. 

Angelus took his cock in hand, lightly stroking himself. Willow's eyes followed his hand as she unconsciously licked her lips. She looked up at him for… comprehension… permission? 

With a patronizing smile, Angelus insisted, "Go ahead. You know it's what you want." 

Willow hated that he was right. All that she wanted in that moment was to taste him. 'I'm doing this because I want to, not because he wants me to,' she told herself as she slowly moved her head closer to his bobbing cock. 

Angelus released his light grip, offering himself to the girl kneeling before him. He moaned as Willow ran her tongue from balls to bulbous head and back again. She ran her tongue around the head, lapping up the moisture that oozed from the tip as her hand stroked his length. 

Willow rested her hands on his hips as she opened her mouth to take him in. She breathed on the tip, warming him with her moist breath. At an almost painfully slow pace she took him into her mouth. 

Angelus hissed with pleasure as her fiery mouth covered him. He wanted to pull her down on him. He wanted to thrust into her welcoming orifice. It took all of his self-control to simply wind his fingers in her hair. 

Willow moaned as she took his entire length into her mouth and throat. The reverberations caused Angelus to harden even more as she pulled back with the same agonizing slowness. She knew she wouldn't be able to go this slowly again and wanted to make this torture last. She completely removed her mouth from him, giving the tip a slow, wet kiss. 

Angelus growled in warning, "Don't stop." 

"Wasn't gonna," she impishly replied. This time Willow took him in in one smooth motion. This was one of the parts that she loved – when Angelus was virtually begging for her touch. She was commanding his actions, his reactions, based on how far she took him into her mouth, how much suction she used, or the motions of her tongue. 

"Yes," Angelus moaned as she began to bob her head along his length. 

Willow's hands drifted to Angelus' ass, lightly stroking the cheeks with her nails. His hips reflexively thrust into her retreating mouth, following her motion. She raked her nails over his ass again, encouraging his thrusts. 

Angelus increased his grip on her head, guiding her movements as he began to fuck her mouth. Willow began to moan, low in her throat. 

She slid one of her hands over his hip and down to caress and tug at his balls. Feeling his sac begin to tighten she pulled her head back, preparing for his release. 

She didn't have long to wait as Angelus called out, "Fuck, Willow," as he released his dead seed into her mouth. Willow swallowed quickly, trying to keep up with his spurts. 

Angelus made his way to the bed, suddenly needing to sit very badly. Willow grinned at him from where she was still on her knees. Angelus tiredly gestured for her to come closer. 

Willow debated crawling over, but she didn't want to appear so subservient; instead she gracefully rose to her feet. Angelus scooted back on the bed, resting on his elbows, and watched as Willow teasingly unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans. She shimmied out of the pants, leaving them in a pile on the floor. She continued to close the distance between herself and her lover, finally sliding her sopping panties off as she reached the foot of the bed. 

Willow crawled onto the bed and over Angelus' revitalized erection. 

"I thought you didn't want me to touch you," he reminded her, steadying her hips over his cock. 

"I don't," Willow agreed, lowering herself onto him. "I want to fuck you." 

If Willow's brash words shocked Angelus he hid it well. With his hands on her hips he guided Willow to a brutal pace. He lifted his hips so that her every downward thrust was met halfway. 

Willow slammed her body onto Angelus', only thinking about her need for release. Release of her anger, release of her frustrations, release of her guilt. She needed to pound these feelings out of her body. She pulled Angelus until his face was level with her breast. 

Angelus eagerly took her pebbled nipple into his mouth, suckling at her tender flesh. Willow hissed in pleasure, feeling herself growing closer to release. She dug her nails into Angelus' shoulders, breaking the skin. 

As hoped, Angelus morphed at the scent of his blood and slid his fangs into his mark. Unknowingly she uttered her secret fear, "I love you," as her body stiffened and all of the tension she'd been feeling was suddenly gone. 

Angelus smiled in satisfaction at her confession. He flipped the satisfied girl over and pounded into her until he found his own release. As soon as he finished Willow muttered, "Get out." 

"I beg your pardon," he laughed, thoroughly amused that she was trying to dismiss him. 

"You got what you wanted, now get out." She rolled onto her side, facing away from the vampire. "Some of us have to get up early to prepare to take over teaching the computer classes because SOMEONE killed her teacher." 

"My, my Willow, I'm so proud of you, stepping into your teacher's shoes," Angelus teased. "Let's not get too comfy in them. I wouldn't want you following too closely in her footsteps." He teasingly bit her shoulder with blunt teeth before rolling out of bed. "I'll be seeing you soon." 

Willow lay there trying to remember if she has said the words aloud or only thought them: I love you. She shivered just thinking of combining those three words together and then applying them to Angelus. Yet as much as the thought disturbed her, she knew they were true. 

Angelus had shown her a side of herself she had never known existed. He'd made her feel beautiful time and time again. He'd brought her pleasure that she had never expected to experience – at least not at such a young age. Even as he purposely did things to repulse her, he nurtured the aspects of herself that feared rejection. He made her a stronger person and for that she loved him. 

A few days later Willow found a disk that had fallen between Ms. Calendar's desk and a filing cabinet. It contained the curse to give Angelus back his soul. Unknown to Angelus, he had given her the strength and self-confidence she would need to lock him back in his cage. 

~> End Flashback 

  
Spike's hand was on the door when the phone rang. He rolled his eyes as Willow adjusted her path in order to answer it. 

"C'mon pet, we need to get going," Spike whined. 

"Sush." Willow flicked her wrist at him, lifting the receiver to her ear. "Hello?" 

"Willow, thank God I caught you," Cordelia gushed. 

"We're on our way out the door right now," Willow confirmed. "Another 30 seconds and you would have missed us." 

"Well it's a good thing you took your sweet time getting ready," Cordelia commented. 

"I beg your pardon," Willow testily responded, having experienced one of the most hellish days of her life. 

"I mean it's a good thing I caught you before you left to tell you that you don't need to come anymore." 

"I… What?" Willow sank onto the couch, a look of utter confusion on her face. Spike was even more confused as he could only hear Willow's responses from this distance. He moved to sit next to her, pressing his ear to the phone so he could hear what the cheerleader was saying too. 

"It turns out it was only a temporary 'perfect happiness' thing," Cordelia brightly informed the redhead. 

"Temporary? But how…" 

"Remember I said the actress did something?" Cordy paused for Willow to grunt in the affirmative. "It turns out she slipped some kind of really powerful tranquilizer into Angel's drink, Doxi-something." 

"Doximall?" Willow numbly guessed. 

"Yeah, that sounds 'bout right." 

"Goddess," Willow gasped. "Isn't it supposed to induce…" 

"Bliss?" Cordelia finished. "Yup. Angel became completely relaxed and happy. But since it was artificial bliss it'll just wear off – we think." 

"You think?" Spike interjected. 

"Wesley's pretty sure," Cordelia confirmed. 

"How can you get sure?" Willow asked, unsure if she should be nervous or relieved. 

"Well… we kinda knocked him out and have Angel chained to his bed at the moment." 

Willow spoke over Spike's burst of laughter. "And how is that gonna help?" 

"If he's still Angel tomorrow we'll let him go. If he's still all Angelus-y then I'll give you a call back and you can come and do your thing." 

"Those are two really big ifs," Willow commented. "Wait a minute, you said if he's still Angel…" 

"Oh, yeah, he woke up just before I called you," Cordelia confirmed. 

"And…" Willow prompted. 

"He seems to be Angel again, but we're waiting until tomorrow to make sure he isn't faking." 

Willow let out a long sigh of relief. 'It was all just a fluke,' she silently mused. 

"You have no idea how happy I am to hear that it was all a humungous mistake," Willow told the former cheerleader. 

"Believe me, I know," Cordelia agreed. "I'll give you a call later to let you know what the final results are." 

"Thanks, Cordy. I'll talk to you then." Willow hung up the phone and sagged against Spike. 

"All those painful memories relived for nothing," she grumbled. 

"Not nothing," Spike contradicted, softening the words by running his hands along Willow's arms. 

"No, not nothing," Willow agreed. She shifted her position so that she could look at Spike. "As painful as it was to have to go over all of those times again in my head I'm glad you know the truth." 

"So am I, pet," Spike soothed. "You know, bein' a demon, I never thought about what it was like for the girls we seduced. It was only about me – my hunger, my bloodlust, my needs." 

"And now?" 

"Now… Well, I wouldn't take it back 'cause it was right fun. But I do feel sorry for the chits." 

Willow considered getting on his case about his indifferent attitude, but she honestly couldn't blame him. He didn't have a soul and therefore was incapable of feeling remorse. Instead she decided to change the subject. 

"Well, now that we don't have to go and force a soul down your sire's throat, what do you want to do tonight?" 

Spike momentarily chucked, but calmed himself in order to respond. "Whatever you want, luv. You've had a hard day." 

With the mischievous gleam in her eyes that Spike loved, Willow said, "I think I want to take a bath." 

Spike's facial expression matched Willow's. "A bath, yeah? Want some company?" 

"Always," Willow grinned, getting to her feet. 

Taking Spike's hand in hers, Willow led him to the bathroom. She loved this bathroom – it was one of the reasons they had taken this apartment – for it held her version of heaven… a Jacuzzi bathtub. 

"I'll be right back," she informed Spike, leaving him to fill the tub. 

Spike adjusted the water until it was the temperature he knew Willow preferred. As the tub filled he set about lighting the candles strategically placed around the bathroom. The warm scent of vanilla permeated the room. Spike turned off the ceiling light, allowing the candles to do their job. 

As he waited for Willow to return Spike removed his boots, socks and t-shirt. He was about to remove his pants when a sultry voice from the doorway stopped him. 

"Mmm, allow me." Willow was standing in the doorway wearing a midnight blue silk robe that stopped mid-thigh, hair pinned up off her neck. 

Willow walked over to the tub, tested the temperature and turned off the water. "Perfect," she purred, turning back to Spike. 

Spike was thankful that he didn't need to breathe, for Willow was truly breathtaking. His eyes darkened with desire as Willow finished opening his pants and slid them off his body. Willow led him to the tub and watched as he lowered his beautiful body into the water. 

Spike sighed as the hot water began to soak into his skin, giving him a warmth he hasn't possessed in over a century. He opened his eyes and held out a hand for Willow to join him. 

Willow pulled on the end of her belt, pulling the material free. She slid the soft material off her shoulders and let it pool on the floor around her feet. 

Taking Spike's offered hand she stepped into the water and settled herself between Spike's legs, leaning against his chest. 

Spike reached over and turned on the jets. Both members of the tub moaned in pleasure as the water began to bubble and caress their skin, easing the tension of the day away. 

Spike rested his hands on Willow's shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze before reaching for Willow's shower poof. He squeezed some of her soap onto the poof and got it all nice and sudsy. With gentle caresses, Spike washed Willow's arms and chest, breasts and torso, down to her thighs, as far as he could reach… washing and stimulating at the same time. 

Willow writhed sensually against Spike, his teasing washing driving her crazy with need. Each time she squirmed under his touch she rubbed enticingly against the erection trapped between their bodies. 

"Lean forward," Spike requested in a two-fold effort to ease the pressure on his cock and enable him to wash Willow's back. Willow pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs, giving Spike access to her back. 

As Spike washed her back with the same teasing strokes, Willow reached behind her to lightly take Spike's cock in her hand. Spike moaned at her touch. He abandoned his washing to reach around Willow to tease her nipples. 

Willow pulled away from Spike's hands in order to turn around. She straddled his thighs, capturing his mouth in a passionate kiss. Spike's hands were instantly on Willow again, eagerly roaming over her back and bum. He slipped a hand between them, sliding a finger inside her, testing her readiness. 

Spike groaned when he found her to be wet and ready for him. Willow kissed her way over to his ear to confirm, "I'm ready. I want you." 

Never one to refuse a lady, Spike moved his hands to Willow's hips and lowered her onto his straining erection. Willow paused when Spike was completely sheathed inside her, simply enjoying the feeling of being so filled. 

The water pulsed and churned around their joined bodies, encouraging them to join in the motion. Willow began to lift her body in time with the pulsing jets of water. Spike shifted their bodies so that they were positioned next to one of the jets. Each time Willow raised her hips the pulsating water would caress their exposed flesh. The additional stimulation propelled both of them closer to their climaxes. 

"I love you," Spike panted as he felt his body prepare for release. He captured Willow's mouth, thoroughly kissing her as he shot his seed deep inside her. 

Spike's climax triggered her own and Willow fell over the edge, moaning into Spike's mouth. As their bodies began to relax, Willow pulled out of the kiss to look into Spike's gorgeous eyes. 

"I love you too, Spike. Always." 

  

  
The End  


**Author's Note:**

> Originally written February 25, 2004.


End file.
